So today I had a rather unusual exchange with a complete stranger in the change-room of a public swimming pool. And I swear, this is 100% true. As I was discretely trying to get dressed after my swim workout, an older woman (say 75ish) walked in. I had my back to her as I pulled on my underwear at which point she said “I don’t know how women wear underwear like that. Isn’t it really uncomfortable?” I kid you not. Now I think there are certain things that you just don’t do or say in a change-room and commenting on a stranger’s choice of underwear is definitely one of them. I wish I had said something terribly
sarcastic witty back to her but all I could come up with was a slightly flustered and lame ”No – once you get used to them you never go back”. Now that I’ve had time to think about it, plus a couple of drinks, here are a few things I wish I said:
- Me no speak English.
- Guess I’ll find out – I just found these in the locker next to mine.
- I just started wearing this kind so I’m still getting used to them. Back when I had a penis I couldn’t hide my junk in these itty bitty lace things.
- They are actually my husband’s. I accidentally took his workout bag instead of mine.
- Free the cheeks, dude. You should try it; it’ll blow your mind
I hope I don’t see that woman again as I’m a little fearful that this exchange has opened up a dialogue and a familiarity between us that I don’t wish to continue. Since we have already discussed my underwear, what might be next??